“Find something new to love today.” We live in a complex world, filled with a great deal of hardship and negativity, but there are always positives to balance it out. This is a wondrous multiverse we’re a part of, and there are new beautiful, fantastic, incredible things out there every second. So do yourself a kindness, and find something new to love every day. It doesn’t have to be as big as finding a new person to love, it can be as simple as finding a new food or drink that you love, or seeing and loving the first flowers of spring, or loving the weather of the day. It can be anything, but do, do find something new to love today.
Music for me can be a great source of new things to love. Every time an artist I love comes out with a new song I am filled with joy and love. Finding new food delivery places with good food is a major source of love for me. I used to work at Starbucks, so inventing the perfect drink for myself could be something new to love. And then there are always the bigger ticket items. After all, how much psychological, mental, emotional, and spiritual good is done when you make a new friend or fall in love? With a new love, every day brings something new to love about them. Don’t feel bad if that’s an extreme rarity for you though– this week, one of the new things I love is a soft blanket, it’s really okay if it something that simple.
“Be as simple as you can be; you will be astonished to see how uncomplicated and happy your life can become.” -Paramahansa Yogananda. This is another good quote to attempt to live by. Be content with the little things. Be happy you have food when you need it. Be happy you are loved. Be happy you have somewhere to sleep. Find joy in the small things; a good cup of coffee, the blossoms on a magnolia tree, seeing your wife wake up, reading a good book, learning something new, being productive, practicing self-care. All of these are excellent things. And yet, they are simplicity itself. There is no need over to over-complicate yourself or your life– it’s important to keep in mind that more does not always equate better.
Over the years I’ve come to notice that when I let my life become too full of complications, my brain begins to feel like a “going out of business” sale; I’m overrun, too much is happening, too many people need too much from me, and the longer time wears on the less I have left. So I’ve started the life-equivalent of spring cleaning. My goal is to do that before it reaches an untenable point, but sometimes we don’t realize that something is unsustainable until we find our hard limit. Usually, though, I think it’s good to check in with yourself and your life on a regular basis, whatever feels right and fitting to you. It may be beneficial to begin by being a little strict with yourself, and doing a self-assessment for your version of simplicity every other day or so, and gradually bringing it down to once a week once you feel comfortable with your ability to maintain that, and then bi-weekly, and once monthly, and then perhaps every three to four months. I wouldn’t personally check in any less frequently than that, though. It’s amazing how quickly one’s life can accumulate complications.
“A person full of hatred treats human beings as things; a person full of love imparts a living personality even to lifeless objects.” -Osho. There is no room for beauty in life without love. The euphoria of music is empty and you lose the joy of stepping out into the sun, of taking that first sip of coffee, of kneeling in the dirt to work in your garden, of picking up a beloved book, of settling in bed beside someone dear, of seeing your friend’s name light up your phone, of sleeping on soft sheets, of accomplishing a goal, of dressing for you and you alone…well, you get the idea. People with love in their hearts walk with a song in their step and dance when they walk, at least on the inside. People full of hatred are so toxic that they corrode themselves until all that’s left is a miserable husk.
So for me, that comes into play most when there is someone or something I hate. I reach a point in the loathing where I end up at a crossroads. I can either let go of that negative energy I’m holding and fueling every day, or I can sit by and allow myself to be consumed by it. I have to ask myself, Would I rather be like the people I hate, or like the people I love? For like follows like, and both negative and positive energy tend to beget more of the same. The most difficult situations I end up in are when I’m holding onto the hatred for someone who has hurt me or someone I love. The latter is infinitely harder to let go of. So sometimes I’ll visualize standing between the two, literally: Whomever it is I hate at the time, and whomever it is they’ve hurt whom I love. And I’ll look at them both, and see which feeling outweighs which, the hatred for the first or my love for the second? And for me, love always wins. I hated them so much because I love someone they’d hurt, so all of it was born from love. And because of that, I am able to choose loving and letting go over continuing to stoke the hatred.
There are a lot of really good questions it helps to ask yourself when you’re faced with a negative situation, and you’re trying to stay positive. One of the first should be “Is this worth getting upset over?” And I try not to go off of my already upset knee-jerk reaction answer.

Upset Me: YES it is absolutely worth getting upset over, are you kidding me?
My Rational Self: Okay, but…Is it really, though? Is it going to horribly impact your life? Make it unlivable? Is it ruining anything irreparable? Do I have no recourse, or do I have options here? No, no, no, no, and options? Okay. I see. Yeah. Not worth getting upset over.
Upset me: …But…ANGRY/SAD/DISAPPOINTED.
My Rational Self: I know. But not forever.

Another one of the first should be “Am I overreacting to or overthinking the situation?” Because I know I do that sometimes. Sometimes, the reaction is not about the situation, but is really just the straw that broke the camel’s back, or a stand in for something related, or but a grain of sand on the beach of similar problems. And my other top three question is “Can I control the situation?” That’s an important question, and can determine everything about your next actions. The following set of questions are equally important, however, and they are: “What is the lesson here? What can I learn from this? What is the positive I can take away from this? How is this making me a better person? What can I do right now to make myself feel better? How can I see the situation with love?” These tend to follow the Yes answer to the question of “Is this worth getting upset over?”
It’s important to remember that you can also always tailor your routine of questions to fit your particular difficulties. Additionally, you can create other sets of question routines to apply to circumstances beyond when you’re faced with a potentially upsetting problem. For example, I try to ask myself three questions before I open my mouth to say something. Those questions are: Is it kind? Is it honest? Is it necessary? Three very simple questions, but a great place to start.
“Whatever purifies you is the right path, I will not try to define it for you.” -Rumi. Basically, do right by yourself and strive to be better than yesterday, first, last, and always. As long as what you’re doing harms no one, follow your own path by repeatedly making the decision to move forward in a positive direction. Even when it gets hard and ugly, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re on the “wrong” path.
I personally don’t believe each person has only one “true” or “correct” path. There are innumerable roads that lead to a better self. Chances are, most of us will travel a great many different roads in any one given lifetime. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Because every single person is unique, everyone is going to have their own version of seeing the positive. No two people see or experience a situation the same way, and because we all have our own perspectives, we’ll each come away with something different.